Every idea, every proposal or project has a beginning, a middle and an ending. There are people who are really good at starting or beginning things. Others, that once they get things going are good at keeping them going, while others still, aren’t adept at beginning things but are great at finishing things. Every one of us is better at one then we are at the others. It’s good to know which one you are so that you can 1) just be curious about how you operate, 2) see how it serves you to perhaps begin things but not to finish them or finish things but not begin things, and 3) get support to get things done.

Where are you strongest? Where are you weaker? I’m very good at beginning projects and I’m pretty good at finishing them too, especially when money is involved, or I’m really invested in the outcome of the project. I’m really bad at finishing things like doing dishes, making my bed, cleaning off my desk – daily stuff that are elemental to everyday life. If I could hire someone to clean my little house every day I would, because I’d love it to be clean – I just don’t want to do it! The fact of the matter is it would only take about fifteen minutes total, every day to make my bed, clean the kitchen and my office. Believe me; I do have 15 minutes to take care of these details, so obviously it’s not about time. What could it be about?

I find that there are other things I don’t finish or complete. I could pay off my credit cards to zero balance, but don’t; I could answer all my emails, cleaning out my email box, but I don’t; I could take care of paper work and bills in a timely manner, but I don’t. What’s that about? In each of these examples I get really close but something stops me from finishing to completion.

So, I took it upon myself to empty out my email box, for one day – just as an experiment. I answered, filed or deleted until there was nothing left to be done! This was such a monumental moment I called my husband to tell him of this incredible feat! He didn’t get it! He didn’t get it until I tied it into all the other places where I don’t complete or finish – like leaving that one last fork or glass in the sink when doing dishes. This one really bugs him, so he got that I was on to something. Why do I consistently leave that one, last detail undone?

So with the practice of keeping my email box empty by responding, filing and deleting as necessary, I took it upon myself to finish all the dishes too – just as an experiment. The next day I awoke feeling emotional and terribly unmotivated. The only way I can explain how I felt is to say that I felt like I had broken up with a boyfriend – just plain yucky, physically and emotionally! I know this emotional sensation was related to finishing these two relatively miniscule projects but how? Why?

Later in the day the explanation came to me as I was being overwhelmingly sad: “I don’t want to complete things because if I complete things that means I’m competent, and if I’m competent that means I can make my own money, and I don’t want to make my own money. I want someone else to make money for me.” 

You have to understand that this particular belief was one I created probably before I was 10 years old. I have three masters’ degrees and a Ph.D; I have been facilitating and completing training programs for nine years, and I’ve written and published a book. I’m obviously competent and can obviously complete things. But here is this one little aspect of my life that has, in her own way, been attempting to sabotage success because she wants someone else to make the money and take care of her – as she witnessed for her mother, who didn’t work a day in her life! This little one was holding out for the dream.

I’m fifty-eight years old and still discovering aspects of myself that have agenda’s other than self-empowerment and self-sufficiency. I was gentle with myself all day, giving me time and space to be with the ending of a dream for this little girl. The following day I was pretty much back to my normal self, feeling far less emotional and ready to get back to my routine, which now includes the practice of doing every last dish and being more intentional about emptying out my email box.

I tell you this story because I find life so fascinating. My life, my stories and experiences are just reflections of what so many of you encounter throughout your days, which are filled with beginnings, middles and endings. It’s good to notice where you get stopped while attempting to fulfill a dream, a goal or just a simple project like getting all the dishes done. It’s also good to be with what shows up as you practice beginning, finishing or pushing through that middle part that can be just as challenging.

In my work as a life and corporate coach, I encourage each of my clients to practice elemental steps – like putting every last fork away, or keeping their email box empty for just a short time – maybe for just a few days. Asking them to do this allows them to practice it without having to commit themselves forever. They can then experience their choice-making process from that deeper, more subtle place. Then, they can decide for themselves whether they want to continue the practice or not.

In every recovery program, such as AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) the slogan “One Step at a Time” is so critical. It’s in these very small, seemingly unimportant aspects of our lives that huge nuggets of living show up. Its fun, fascinating, and yes, sometimes challenging to engage in this experiment of living and cultivating awareness about how you do what you do and be how you be. By doing so, you give yourself a splendid opening to know yourself better. In so doing, you come to respect and honor how you got to this very moment of your life, poised for the next opportunity to sore!

I’d love to hear from you with questions or challenges of your own.

We are all living in a world where getting away from work and day to day activities is simply impossible. There are deadlines to meet, meetings scheduled and family commitments that are lined up. Given this situation, we are constantly postponing when to take a break.
This might be good in the short-term productivity but has a long-term impact that leads to fatigue, exhaustion and STRESS.

Here are some reasons to take a break:

1. Balance: We all need to bring balance in our lives, which implies we give equal importance on being effective at work and life. There is a reason why nature has balance for all existence. That is how we have to shape our lives. If you work hard in your office, work hard on taking a break.

2. Monotony: The biggest reason for loss of productivity is that we get sucked into boredom with our day to day activities. Ieven if we are committed to our work it has a way to get to us. The monotony creeps in and then our actions that were driven by passion are driven out of frustration – courtsey monotony. So we need to refresh ourselves to get back to work with full passion.

3. Creativity: There is a part of us that needs to tap into our creativity. When we come from a place of creativity, we are able to think news ways of how we do things that we do. Innovation and fresh perspective helps us from being stuck.

So, remember to take a BREAK.

The body’s natural relaxation response is a powerful antidote to stress. Relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, visualization, progressive muscle relaxation, meditation, and yoga can help you activate this relaxation response.

Getting the most out of your relaxation practice

Set aside time in your daily schedule. The best way to start and maintain a relaxation practice is by incorporating it into your daily routine. Schedule a set time either once or twice a day for your practice. You may find that it’s easier to stick with your practice if you do it first thing in the morning, before other tasks and responsibilities get in the way.

Don’t practice when you’re sleepy. These techniques can relax you so much that they can make you very sleepy, especially if it’s close to bedtime. You will get the most out of these techniques if you practice when you’re fully awake and alert.

Choose a technique that appeals to you. There is no single relaxation technique that is best. When choosing a relaxation technique, consider your specific needs, preferences, and fitness level. The right relaxation technique is the one that resonates with you and fits your lifestyle.

Increasing Productivity is very important for all of us. Here is a productivity system, Zen to Done (ZTD) which  is based on David Allen’s “Getting Things Done” (GTD), as well as on the work of Stephen Covey and others. It’s a set of 10 habits that will help you get organized, simplify your life, get things under control, and get things done.

Instead of trying to implement all 10 habits at once, Leo recommends that you choose one habit at a time and focus on it for 30 days. Then move on to the next one.

The 10 Habits of ZTD are:

• ZTD Habit 1: Collect

• ZTD Habit 2: Process – Make Quick Decisions on Things In Your Inbox

• ZTD Habit 3: Plan

• ZTD Habit 4: Do One Thing at a Time Without Distractions

• ZTD Habit 5: Simple, Trusted System

• ZTD Habit 6: Everything in Its Place

• ZTD Habit 7: Weekly Review

• ZTD Habit 8: Simplify

• ZTD Habit 9: Routine

• ZTD Habit 10: Find Your Passion

Continue reading this post:  Ten habits of Zen to Done by Marelisa

Stress is internal, which explains why it can wreak havoc on your health. It feels awful…it’s the sense that you’re not in control. The easiest way to mitigate its effect is to take charge of the one and only thing you have the power to control…YOU, and let go of what you can’t control. The beauty of this recipe is that by taking control of your life, external or outside things will change in response to your internal changes. Here are 10 steps to destress for your present and future:

1. Heal yourself.

Dr. Bruce McEwen, who wrote The End of Stress As We Know It, suggests that eliminating stress comes right from your grandmother’s journal. He says the most effective steps you can take are the simplest: exercise, a healthy diet, regular sleep, moderate to minimal alcohol intake, and no smoking. This, he notes, is the most sophisticated, up to the minute, cutting edge science available!

2. Get organized.

Physical clutter reminds us of things that need to be done and that’s stressful. Remove your physical clutter and you’ll eradicate your mental clutter, plus you’ll feel energized. The recipe for eliminating clutter is the same regardless of the room or space you’re working on. In short, begin by defining the purpose of your room, then identify the major categories to be kept in your space, sort all your belongings into those categories, edit each category, and finally, put your possessions in a pleasing and practical place.

3. Set boundaries.

Boundaries act as a filter to keep you safe from the hurtful behavior of others while allowing in the love, support and nurturing actions we all need. Set your boundaries by: (a) determining what others cannot do to you or in your presence and (b) sharing this information respectfully with anyone who is stepping over one of your boundaries.

4. Take time for yourself.

Put together a list of all the things you love to do but haven’t regularly made time to do. Put your list in priority order and enter the top five to seven items into your daily calendar. Your list may include things as simple as journaling, reading a great book, taking a bubble bath, yoga, etc. You’ll be more successful getting to these activities when you give them a time and place on your calendar.

5. Be positive.

William James, the father of modern psychology said, “The greatest discovery of my generation is that man can alter his life simply by altering his attitude of mind.” In other words, what you say and what you tell yourself impact the present and create your future. Love yourself and use the power of positive words, pleasing thoughts and affirming beliefs to live the life you want to live.

Continue Reading the article: Top 10 steps to De-stress